Sunday, September 16, 2012

Happy Birthday, Daddy!

My Dearest Jessep Michael,
  Today (well, yesterday), we celebrate your 24th birthday. Bruce & Meg, Casey & Katie, Mangey, Pat & Lindsey, Michelle & Kody and your mom and her boyfriend came to have a BBQ & bonfire. Maybe a few beers, too ;)
 I wanted to post about how much I just absolutely love you and appreciate all that you do for Hunter and I. If it were not for you, I would not wake up feeling like the most lucky girl in the world.
I cherish every moment I get to spend with you.
When you are gone, I constantly look at the clock, counting down the minutes until we are all together again.
 
I admire your hard work outside of the house that enables me to be a stay at home mom.
If it were not for you taking such good care of me, I would not be able to take such good care of Hunter.
When you are happy, I am happy.

Just look at Hunter, what a happy easy going little boy we have. He is the way he is because of how much you love him.

 On your 24th birthday, your first birthday as a father, we celebrate what an awesome guy you are, babe. You are so perfect for me. I love the way you make me feel and push me to be a better person. I love who I am with you. Just perfect. I love our life.

I love you, babe!

Erin & Hunter
  xo

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

(Belated) Happy 9 Months, Handsome!

(Disclaimer: I wrote this on my iPad nd it never published. I KNEW I wrote it and just found it so I am publishing a month and a day late.


Happy 9 months, handsome Hunter!

You are becoming less and less like a baby everyday. On one hand, I my heart aches because I want to cuddle and keep you innocent forever but on the other hand, I am okay with your independence as I feel I have embraced every new thing you have discovered and learned to do. Besides, you will always be my baby. 

In the last month, you have become more of the little man we have dreamed of.....

YOU HAVE TWO NEW TEETH! The bottom left then bottom right teeth both came in. You were a CHAMP! You spiked a slight fever when they cut through your gums. I am sad, you are going to look so different when they grow in all the way. Then again, it IS going to be pretty darn cute.

Speaking of teething, the last few days, you broke out in what we think is a "teething rash." It looks like chicken pox but worse on your face.

You get yourself from standing to the ground, not gracefully but you get there.

SO fast standing up, getting yourself from sitting to your belly and belly to sitting.

Ruled out strawberries, you break out after eating them.

Met your biological paternal Grandmother and her boyfriend. We went to the Addison County Field Days, first time for all of us, with all of them.

You still nurse 5-6x a day. 

Still will go for the meat on your tray first if served with something else. 

You got your first tattoo. 

Your hair is becoming more blonde, less red.

You think it is so funny to crawl out of the room we are playing in then when I come to get you, you crawl away faster and laugh.

Still lingering around 19 lbs.

We are trying cloth diapers again. I am SO sick of wasting money on disposables. 

You got your first wagon and you love to ride in it. Daddy loves how big the wheels are!

You think it is cool when the freezer is opened, love paper, and Daddy's duck calls.

Your hair is getting curly in the back. Few curls! Daddy calls you his immature duck.

We bought you your first tooth brush and you think it is funny when we brush your teeth.

You are so fun and we are so excited to see where this next month brings us with you. In the next month, Mommy goes back to school. You will be with Grammy, again. Hope you behave as well for her as you do for Mommy ;)

We love you, little man!

Love Always,
Mommy
  Xoxoxo

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Happy 10 Months, Baby Boy!

I suck at blogging. I have not posted in forever and have a list of things I want/need to post about! Even a giveaway!! I swear I have posted a few times, one being Hunter's 9 month update but I can see it! Anywho, without further or do....
 
DOUBLE DIGITS!! While I am trying to embrace every second I can with you, I still feel it all just happens so fast. I am still forever grateful that I get to be your mommy. Your personality is evolving so quickly now, making me fall more and more in love with you everyday!

 In the last month of your life, you:
 
 Said "mama" on the way to Grandpa David and Nana's wedding and have not stopped since
 Point at things that excite you or that you want
 Dance when someone sings, you hear a song or a phone rings
 Carry things in your mouth when you're crawling that you are going to play with after
 Can sign milk, all done, more but have recently stopped
 Look up when you hear airplanes go over
 
Went to the Champlain Valley Fair for the 1st time; you hate an elk jerky stick, tried a bite of fried oreo (sh, don't tell anyone!), went on your first carnie ride, Choo Choo Charlie with Daddy then played Fat Albert.


Went Apple Picking for the first time at Allenholm then went for cider donuts at Hacketts.


On September 1st, we had goulash for dinner and you sucked the tomato soup off and spit out the noodles. It was so cute. Of course, you ate all the meat first.

Were so entertained at Grandpa David and Nana's wedding. You rode in your wagon down the aisle, played in the grass during the ceremony then danced (and ate) the night away. You did need one nap while we were there so we drove you around for an hour. It was so hot that day that our plan to put you to sleep in the camper just was not going to happen.
 

You still wear size 4 diapers, size 18 mo clothes, and size 4/5 shoe but you hate wearing shoes, you will not move when they are on your feet. Maybe we will invest in some slippers to start off.
 
 You love bread. If someone gives you bread, when it gets soggy and small, there is still no taking it away even to give you a new slice. Still love chicken the most and have recently loved apples. You never cared about them before but you must know they are in season, now!

 You have graduated your bath seat. You think it is cool to walk around the tub.

 You stick your tongue out. Adorable!


You go to Mommy's Public Speaking class and are the center of attention! You're easy to keep stimulated.

You play peek-a-boo by putting something in front of your face and pulling it down with a giant grin on your face.



 You kiss the phone when you see peoples pictures on them and kiss yourself when you crawl over to the oven and see your reflection. That's my loverboy!

 I always feel like I am missing something in here. I probably am. There is no way I can capture the fun and how cool you are in a blog post but at least I feel better throwing some words up there!

  Happy 10 months, baby boy! In the next month, we will be enjoying the start of fall, spending lots of time outside, eating goose and duck and planning your 1st birthday party!! I love you, my sweet sweet boy!

Love Always,
Mommy
 xo
 

Monday, August 6, 2012

Fat Rant.

  As you know, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. At Hunter's 8 month check up (yes, we go to check ups even though they are not necessary SOLELY because I LOVE Hunter's naturopath. Any chance to sit down and talk natural parenting, I take it! Of course, she has to charge insurance so she does the whole routine but for the most part, it is conversing about our parening and lifestyle which I am fascinated by), Hunter was put on the chart at 25% for his weight. All things considered, that is not "bad" per say. 1. He is VERY MOBILE and burning lots and lots of calories for a little guy. 2. He is breastfed. Those charts are of ALL babies, formula fed included. Given formula does not change to adapt to your baby's needs, your child gets what the formula is made of whether they need it or not whereas a breastfed baby, the mothers milk changes to nourish the child at whatever stage they are at. Also, formula babies are sometimes coaxed into finishing the bottle or "come on, drink that last half an ounce" where breastfed babies usually stop nursing when satisfied. (This is NOT the part that formula feeding parents get upset for my generalizations or get defensive as this is not the point of the post).

  Anyway, back to the fat. Considering Hunter IS on the leaner side, our naturopath suggested I take Fish Oil capsules. No. After one of my admired mommy friends reminded me how wary I should be of the ocean because of how contaminated it is, I could not get myself to take it. If the fish are farm raised, EVEN WORSE! I researched many ways to add omegas into my diet, number one being ground flax meal. This is essentially tasteless. If I had to compare SOME taste to it, I would say some kind of nut but to me, when I add it to almost everything, I do not taste it. I also put it on and in Hunter's food now. I only paid $3.99 for this bag that will last awhile!


Hunter does not care for very many foods. What he does like, he loves and there are many that we have offered that he did not care for that time around. Also, Hunter does not eat a lot when he does eat which is fine. I would rather him fill up on breastmilk so when he DOES eat, I want it to be as nutritious as possible. A vital piece of a babies diet? FAT! Babies brains are rapidly growing. In the first year, the brain doubles in size and in the first 6 years, the brain does 75% of its growing. And what are brains? FAT! So what does Hunter eat for breakfast? FAT!

Obviously, not all fats are equally as healthy. Lard? No. Coconut? YES! Hunter LOVES coconut yogurt. Hunter and I do NOT consumer dairy (another post to come). Coconut is uniquely high in a rare medium-chain fat called lauric acid, which is also found in breastmilk! SO Delicous makes traditonal style AND the Greek (creamier) style coconut yogurt. They also make cultured Greek Almond Milk Yogurt which I bet is just as good. This is the only food Hunter will eat from a spoon. Every morning, Hunter has 1/3 or so of the container of yogurt. I do not like dairy yogurt but I LOVE the coconut milk yogurt so I eat whatever is left ;] Just warning you, this is pretty pricey. I paid $2.49/ yogurt for these.

So there you have it. Two ways to get more healthy fats. Feed those babies brain fat! Little man and Daddy are getting off the four wheeler and I bet Hunter wants to tell me all about it. Now off to the store to get your flax and yogurt!


Wednesday, August 1, 2012

It is August. Um, WHAAAAT?!

Holy moly! Is it really August? This month, I start school meaning Hunter is going to be cared for the few hours I am gone by my Grandmother and my cousin, Michelle. I love my school, Champlain College. The way the set the schedule is so awesome! I have 75 minute classes twice a week for each class. I do have some classes that are two in a row so I will be gone three hours at a time MAX but for the most part, I will be about an hour and a half. Champlain is 5 minutes from my house, which is right next door to my Gram's so I get to come right back home to my baby man!

That reminds me, mission make Hunter a safe playroom at Gram's is under way! I have been thrifting extra BPA free and wooden toys to have at my Grams, also, more books because Gram and Shane like to read to Hunter. Next, a baby gate and some baby proofing tools. The countdown to my summer ending is on, ugh.

 Also means that I need to get into gear to plan Hunter's first birthday! He will be 9 months this month. By the time school starts, I will not have time to plan his party to the detail I would like so I need to get researching! I am thinking Tractors and Farm theme? Anyway, laundry is calling my name before he wakes up from his cat nap.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Weekend Update 7/21- 7/23

First off, happy one month wedding anniversary to my ever so sweet husband! A month ago today, we just decided to do a small ceremony and get the important part checked off our list.

Anyway, this weekend we took our time getting up, last minutes for camp then we were off! We kicked back at camp with the fam damily: Grandpa David, Nana, Uncle Mange, Uncle Jaymo, Jen, Shane, Chase, Uncle Jeffy, a few Gillespies stopped by. Grandpa David's new granddaughters, Erin and Amaya were here to visit. We went out on the boat a few times, went for walks, met a dog named Charlie who Hunter LOVED, had a BBQ, ad a campfire. Lots of laughs as usual when you get more than one of us together. The lake has blue green algae in it that is making everyone sick so no way were we swimming in it! We brought Mercedes. It was a nice break for her without Bentley but we miss him!
Now it's Monday a.m, still counting my blessing that Jessep has Monday's off and relaxing on the dock while Hunter naps. I am babysitting Shane and Chase today. Headed to put the game camera for Jess and Mange up later. I'm ready for that relaxing ride through the islands. Speaking of the islands, there is a meeting soon to discuss treating the lake with chloramine. What the F, VT? Clean, sure but do not make the lake worse than it already is! I need to go find, Cedes. Hope everyone had a great weekend!! Xo Erin

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Thoughts From the Milking Parlor

As I sit here in the tub, pumping as I am trying to build my stash for this coming fall semester, I ponder this online journal of mine. Here is a list of things to expect from me in the bear future:
How Jess & I met
Future plans
Our pregnancy
Parenting choices & advocacy on topics such as vaccinations, carseat safety, breastfeeding including "extended breastfeeding," dairy alternatives, Cry it Out theory, Gentle Parenting, Attachment Parenting, Naby Led Weaning, green/non toxic living, diet and nutrition, super foods, herbalism, naturopathy, circumcision, and many more. I am EXTREMELY passionate about my beliefs and can cite my sources with ample authority. Small disclaimer: my comment section is open to debate and I promise you I will challenge you but do not feel attacked and be respectful.

Anyway back to the blog list....
The rest of our summer
Product reviews
Monthly development updated on Hunter
Weekend updates
Tips & advice (mostly mommy stuff)
And random rants

My bottle is nearing 4 oz (yay!) Medela Swing, it's been real.

Erin

Happy 8 Months, Hunter

                                     7/11/2012


  Happy 8 Months, Hunter Man!
            At eight months, it still seizes to amaze me that I created you, you grew inside of me, and that you are mine.
            I am so proud that you:
·         “Army crawl” sometimes you do it with your right foot while your left is in the air
·         Go from your belly to the floor
·         From the floor back to sitting
·         Pull yourself up on things
·         Scale things once you are standing
·         Still breastfed
·         Have figured out the sippy and kind of figured out a straw
·         Are patient when being washed, wiped down (even your face), put sunscreen on
·         Don’t pull on your necklace, hat, and sometimes wear sunglasses

I think it is so cute that you:
·         Still cuddle and are such a mommy’s boy
·         Have strawberry blonde hair which all of a sudden started growing
·         Have a few curls starting on the back of your head
·         Have huge bright blue eyes. Everywhere we go at least one person comments on them
·         Laugh to mimic when you hear or see other people laughing
·         Still toothless
·         Still wake to nurse in the middle of the night. This time is so cherished for me.
·         Splash in water whether it is the pool, tub, sink, or even spilled water
·         Have monkey toes, in fact, your 2nd toe is shorter than the 3rd
·         Hold things in one hand, usually your left concentrate while you stare at it then fling it around while you twist your wrist

Dad thinks it is pretty cool that you have ate rabbit, buffalo, bear, venison, pork, chicken and beef. Even cooler, it is all from New England except the buffalo which is from Colorado. All of those meats are all natural, some even certified organic. Your Dad and I are pretty passionate and conscious when it comes to food, especially food that you are eating. Your Dad also loves that when we are in Sears, Lowes or Home Depot, we cannot walk by the tractors without your feet kicking and you letting out your excited scream. Obviously, we knew you would love four wheelers. You were riding them even when you were still inside me! Whenever your Dad takes you for a ride on the four wheeler, you let out your biggest excited scream. When it gets shut off, you slap the wheeler to go again. It is the cutest little thing! If you get walked by it, you turn your neck to look at it until it is out of your sight. Even when it is started and you cannot see it, you look for the wheeler. We will have to get into four wheeling or maybe motocross when you get older. That would be so fun for us and we would be so proud.
Besides the things that we love about you, there are many things that you, yourself love:


·         Blackberries & Strawberries
·         Tubbie Time
·         Little Toy Balls
·         Mickey Mouse
·         Grammy
·         Grandpa La La
·         Swimming in the pool or lake
·         Tractors & Four Wheelers
·         Bite & Pinch people
·         Shane
·         To watch other kids be busy



You think it is so funny and cool when you are in your crib. I will put you in there from time to time so that I can go do something quickly and I come back to you entertaining yourself. Not with the toys though, it will be the string from your crib bumper or something small like that, of course!
There are also a few things that you do not like:


·         Kiwi
·         Watermelon
·         Blueberries
·         Carseat
·         Broccoli


You are so big now

·         18.6 lbs 29” and you’re head is 17” around (25% weight, 90% height)

·         12 month clothes

·         5 diaper

·         3 shoe


To conclude, I want to promise you that I will continue to give you the love and comfort you need to help you continue to develop into the smart and healthy little boy that I love! Your smile keeps me going everyday, baby boy!

Most Precious Love Always,

Mommy Xo

           

Hunter's Birth Story


                I feelit is appropriate to start out our blog by writing Hunter’s story. I haveattempted to sit down and write it numerous times, first at two weeks, thenagain at 2 months, 3 months, 6 months and here we are at your 8 month birthday.Hunter, I do apologize because this would be a lot more detailed, includinghappy “monthday” posts on the 11th of every month, documenting yourmilestones of that month but I have the perfect excuse! We have been way toobusy having the time of our lives parenting you. Our lives have changed SO muchsince we found out we were pregnant! Everything is going so great. You are acharm, an angel, THE perfect baby! Here’s your story…

                First,let me start by saying that your parents are so crazy about each other and wereabsolutely MEANT TO BE. There is no denying that. How we meant, which leads tohow you came to be will be another post to come.

Jump back in time to late Feb. 2010,we found out that we were pregnant! We wanted a baby  so bad. I just KNEW that I was pregnant so Iwent to Shaws and bought the store brand pregnancy test. I took it right awayat home. I peed in the cup and let it sit. It almost immediately went to twolines but it was SO faint! I texted Jessep telling him I wasn’t sure but therelooked like two lines. He was so disappointed that I couldn’t wait but I HADto, just HAAAAD to take the test. I NEEDED to know. After having a miscarriage,I was scared this moment would never happen again, like I was broken, that Iwas not meant to have a baby so when I got thatfeeling, I HAD to go to the store. When Jessep came home, we went to the storeagain and bought a ClearBlue digital test to avoid the pink lines. When itblinked pregnant I had the best feeling, so far in my life. It is literallyunexplainable. Relief, joy, excitement, anticipation.

                Fastforward through the pregnancy and telling our family and friends, which I willhave another post about someday soon, to labor.

 Thursday, November 10, 2011, the day I wentinto labor. I could not sleep past 6 a.m. Just couldn’t. I went all day feelinggreat, energized, anxious, but not getting my hopes up for the due date. I gotexamined the Monday before where one of our midwives, Mary Jo, said that therewas no dilation or effacement. I went to our doula, Lydia B., who was a lastminute plan, to talk labor and delivery. I know Lydia from Winooski Swim Teamand I was friends with her little sister growing up. She served me a doubledose of Smooth Move laxative tea and gave me a hand and foot massage. WhenJessep got out of work, we rushed to sit down with our doula before I had to goto my government night class. It was about 4pm when we sat down to talk aboutour birth plan. While sitting at Lydia’s dining room table, I started to getvery sharp pains in my belly that radiated from my back. I could not sit still.I had to arch my back or move every time. All of a sudden, I got really hot and started to sweat. 

After leaving the doulas’ house,Jessep dropped me off on campus to attend my 3 hours American Government class.My professor has catered to my pregnancy and has always been super supportive.He gave me all my work ahead of time, took all assignments super early and gaveme everything back before everyone else, too. He always seemed interested andwanted to give me advice every class. To my liking, he gave the impression thathe was a hippie so his advice was rather refreshing. When I came into class, heasked how I was doing. Apparently I looked in pain because he asked me morethan once if I was okay. He also mentioned the full moon and barometricpressure that were in line to work in my due dates favor. Now I look back, duedate schmue date but since we knew we were pregnant, I thought 11.11.11 waspretty darn cool. No high hopes though.

Off my rant, back to class. I haveno idea what Professor Ryder was lecturing about that night as I was havingregular timed pains. I started to time them as they began to increase inseverity. I texted Jessep. “Babe, be ready to come get me when I say.” I textedmy mom who helped me time them on the other end of the text as she attempted tokeep me calm. She was headed my way, anxious to meet her first grandson. Rightbefore the half way break, I texted Jessep, “COME NOW!”

At the break, I calmly told theteacher I had to go. In a panic, all in one heartbeat, he asked if I was inlabor, took my backpack, and grabbed my arm as if he was going to carry me. Itold him I had a ride coming to pick me up. Professor Ryder walked me to theparking lot where it was cold, dark, and raining outside. I could not help butto laugh the whole time.

When Jessep arrived seconds later(he must have FLOWN to Champlain), I got in the truck and got the urge to poop.It was URGENT! I kept debating to myself, “wait a few more stoplights until weget home or have Jess stop at a store?” STORE! There is ONE teeny tiny delifrom our house to campus, the Kampus Kitchen. I HAD TO GO! I bolted through thedoor demanding the bathroom. The girl clearly understood and brought me to therestroom. I turned on the water for sake of an audience and just let go. Whatthe…..?!?! Our childbirth educator was not kidding, you really do have a loosebowel movement before labor. I look in the dirty mirror, I look like hell. I amsweating bullets, feel dizzy, and need to sit down. It hit me. Right there inthat rinky dink bathroom. I am in labor.

I return to the truck and give Jessepic details of what he missed by waiting in the truck. He speeds home.  When we got home, my mom came over. I triedto eat but was too anxious to do as I had planned: get in the tub until I couldnot wait anymore than go to the hospital, pop you out and go home. That simple.However, I sped things up too fast.

8pm  I got in the tub, got anxious and called themidwives. Krista Knickerson was on duty. Ugh, so NOT who I wanted to talk to.At FAHC you meet 6 midwives. We did not like Krista because she seemed to talkto us like we are just another young couple who will someday soon make astatistic of a failed family. Anyway, I told her my contractions were 3-4minutes apart and seemed to have eased when I got in the tub and had stopped atone point. She told me there were empty rooms but needed to wait to come in. Ina way, I was disappointed she wanted me to wait to go in. I wanted things tohappen. I wanted to meet our baby boy, see what you looked like, if you weregoing to latch on right away, if you looked at all like me. I wanted to go inbut as ordered, waited. I tried to take a nap. Ya right, too anxious. Mycontractions were getting worse in pain. I wanted to make sure my cervix wassoft and took 2 black cohosh root tablets. Back to the tub I went. I texted ourdoula telling her that I think I mightbe in labor and that I will keep her posted. We exchanged text for a while.

10pm After draining the luke warm water and reheating the tub whatfelt like a zillion times, between the two of us being so anxious, we calledthe midwives again. This time, Jess spoke. I was in such pain and I felt mytailbone was going to snap. Jess reported to Krista who was unfortunately stillon duty, and told her that my contractions were 2-3 and sometimes 3-4 minutesapart and growing in pain. She said she needed to “tell me something.” Igrabbed the phone and spoke calmly.

She asked me what was going on.

I replied, “Everything Jess toldyou.”

“Uh huh...” Silent a awkwardpause.

“I feel like my tailbone is goingto snap.”

“Uh huh...” Another silentawkward pause.

“I would like to come in and seewhat’s up.”

“Well, we only want you to comeup if you are in active labor, still sounds early.”

“I am in active labor, I ampanicking and in a lot of pain,” I stress to her, not speaking so calmlyanymore, “My contractions are 2-3 minutes apart.”

“If you feel you need to bechecked out, I suppose you can come up to L&D through the ER but we may notkeep you.”

You suppose I can come up? I am asking for care, lady! And listen, itis not like I am lying about mycontractions. I understand some women are eager to get to Labor and Delivery,as I was but I truly was in labor! Meanwhile, my mom is next door at mygrandmothers’ house, trying to nap because she knows it will not be long andshe had been up since 5 a.m. Jessep called his mother. I called the doula totell her I was dying and headed up. I grabbed the bag and Jessep grabbed thecarseat. Oh, the carseat. I stared at that empty carseat since my mother boughtit for us. I literally would just STARE at it, thinking about all the places Iwould bring you in it. (Sorry, I’ll try not to go off on too many more sappyrants).

11pm  I had contractions the entire way which isonly about 5 minutes. We parked the truck in the garage and went up to thewheelchairs. Jessep drove me to L&D was is literally about a ½ mile away ina chair as if he was a NASCAR driver. I was put into our room and my vitalswere checked. Fine, obviously. They asked if I wanted an IV. No way, I hadplenty to drink in my water bottle. I had written a birth plan and sent it toFAHC with my pre-registration so they shouldhave known that I wanted as little medical intervention necessary. The headnurse was so cool. She was stern yet cool and seemed like she was someone Icould ask questions of. She pushed an IV quite a few times but just like her, Iwas stern, too. She said she will be in every ½ hour to check on me. I bouncedon the ball for a bit until what’s her face midwife came in.

11:30pm Kristacame in to “make sure I was far enough into labor to stay.” I was examined andwas 3 cm dilated. She said I was, “Fine to stay because they had room.”Clearly, she did not get that I wantedto be there. In retrospect, I totally DID NOT want to be there. I should haveknown. Now, I would have had a home birth but even if I did go to the hospital,I would have waited until it was time to push! First thing I asked, “What timeis shift change?” 8am. I took a deep breath. Something about FAHC made me feellike I had no right to expect such things on my birth plan and I was anuisance. Something about Krista, too. I felt like they were going to send mehome so when Krista left, ordering bloodwork to make sure my iron was not toolow for the occasion I want an epidural, I felt relieved. I get to stay.

I studied the room. Walking around, touching everything,pushing buttons, inspecting the blankets that my son would be swaddled in. Itwas so surreal. This is where my son was going to be born.

 Anyway, I asked toget into the tub and Jessep’s mom came somewhere in there.

12pm-2am Icontinued to text my doula, letting her know that I was okay and to stay homewith her kids until I needed her. Everyone in the room was sleeping, Jessepincluded. This is where I am going to be brutally honest. I grief my birthexperience because looking back, IKNOW I could have had Hunter naturally ifJessep would have supported me. He will tell me he did but sleeping when youneed to sleep because you worked all day. Um, no. I AM IN LABOR WITH YOUR SON!We paid over $400 for childbirth classes, mister, just so you could learn tosupport me. But no, I had text my doula, begging her to talk me out of anepidural. I had been up since 6am being a busy body. I was getting exhausted. Ineeded Jessep. At least my mom camein occasionally to check on me. The one time that Jessep did come check on me, he tried to rub my back but by then, Iresented him for letting me do this on my own when we practiced everything athome.  I got checked again, 3.5cm. Theyinsisted on an IV. Krista came in multiple times asking me “What’s going on?”with a really weird look on her face. I always told her still feeling thecontractions. She kept on with her “Uh-huhs” and long awkward silences after.

2am The nurseconned me into it saying that if I wanted to get an epidural as I looked tired,that I should get an IV now so when I do throw my white flag in, that I couldget it ASAP. I got the damn IV.

From 2am-4am Iwas in and out of the tub. I got checked again, 4cm. I surrender. I did notthink I could do it alone. As much as I wanted to bring my precious son intothis world without drugs, I asked for the epidural. I could not push with whatlittle energy I had. I was so tired I could not even think of things to help mylabor. I needed sleep. I dried off, went pee and got in the bed. Theanesthesiologist came in fairly quickly. I felt heavy. Guilt. I did not wantthat damn needle. I wanted Jess. I needed Jess. To this day, he thinks hehelped. I do not see it. I was balling. Sobbing. The young nurse with theanesthesiologist asked me, “Why are you crying?” “I did not want anyinterventions.” She replied, “Everyone gets one, honey.” I felt like I wastreated as if my birth plan was out of the question. Everyone in ChittendenCounty RAVES of Fletcher Allen Health Care for their birthing ward and staff.Well, I say different. For coming in with an all-natural birth plan, informedof my options, they pretty shitty and not supportive.  

                Theanesthesiologist, a gentlemen, explained to me crap I already knew. Stillsobbing, they place Jessep in front of me to hold me. I balled on his shoulder,nervous that this would paralyze me or something. It burned like hell. Not 30minutes later, I was asleep.  Everythingis a blur after that. The next events I write of happened, not sure if they arein exact order and not sure of many times but I know I was checked on everyhalf hour and that I was eager to see Mary Jo.

                I sleptfor awhile. I was strapped to the contraction and baby heartrate machines. Sometime after, they broke my water. It was a lot of warm water and every time Imoved after that, more fluid came out. I needed a catheter, too. I pounded thewater so no wonder I needed one. It was not fun, especially with Krista.

 At some time, they reported that the epiduralseverely slowed down my contractions and that I needed Pitocin. My mind wentracing but I signed up for this going to FAHC, putting the last nail in thecoffin of my birth plan when I asked for the epidural. I think the Pitocin was administered at 9am so I saw Mary Jo beforethen, I think? I do remember it was refreshing to see her. The low dose did notdo much. They wanted to increase. I was so drowsy that I told them go aheadwith the larger dose. I slept more, switching sides when I felt my leg going tosleep. The epidural made me so itchy. I know way more people than allowed cameinto my room and stayed for a while. I was so out of it I do not know who wasthere and what time it was but I do know they saw me practically nakey as I wasfalling out of my gown. I slept for awhile longer until Mary Jo came in tocheck me a little after 2pm.

“Erin, you are at 10cm, it is time to push.”  My heart sank. I felt like I did not know whatto do. Mary Jo set up and checked me one more time. She said I was 100% effacedand your head was “right there.”  Onenurse took one leg, Jesseps’ mom taking the other. My mom called my Gram whowas supposed to be in the room with me but felt like she had the flu the daybefore so she could not come. Gram was on the phone listening to me push Hunterthe whole time. I touched your head. Oh, my goodness. I touched you! I evenwatched you with a mirror. At some point, Lydia came back and had Danielle’scamera. She took awesome photos, some that you can see when you are mature. Ican remember clear as day what I saw in the mirror.

2:30pm  Everyone coached me, “he is so close, you’realmost there, push hard!”  Fourcontractions or so later, you were born. You had pooped right before you cameout so your father could not cut the cord which really made us sad.

Hunter RobertGaudette 7lb 10oz 21in

Your father ran over to the warmingtable where they checked you out, put your matching bracelet on, etc. He ranback over to me and said, “Oh my god, babe, he’s so cute!” I was sobbing,obviously. I remember looking like complete hell but I felt great. I justpushed a baby out. I cannot give myself as much credit as I would like tobecause I am much more informed on birth now in regards to how much is actually necessary but it was easierthan I thought.

I delivered the placenta sometimeafter that. I remember seeing it but did not pay much attention. I wanted tohold you. The skin to skin did not happen immediately like I wanted as youpooped before and I still grieve that, 8 months later. I had to get twostitches at you were fairly big considering how small I am plus, you came outfast, not giving me time stretch. Another downside to an epidural, you do notknow when you are tearing because you cannot feel it so you just push as hardas possible.

A few minutes after you were born,you were wiped off and put on my chest. You were (and still are) SO SOFT! Youwere so alert, wide awake, and bright eyed. That clearly stuck to you because,still today, when there is so much going on, you sit back and observe. You donot need to be involved to be happy. They put a hospital hat on you at first but OH, NO! Not Hunter. He HADto have the camo beanie! About a half hour or so after you were born, I keptasking, should I feed him? Not sure why I was waiting, I should have done itright away but the staff was making me nervous. I attempted to get you to latchbut you just were not hungry.

A group of family and close friendscame flooding in. Grandpa La La, Grandpa David, Uncle Casey, Michelle,Danielle, and Monica. We all took pictures with you then it was time to go to“the dungeon.”

5pm Ironically,Shep 5, the new baby ward at FAHC is dark and gloomy. Prior to your birth, wewent on a tour of FAHC birthing ward and they told us that fathers areconsidered visitors and must leaving after visiting hours have ended. NO WAY INHELL WAS YOUR FATHER LEAVING! If he had to go, we were going with him! I do notunderstand. You are OUR baby. This is sacred family bonding time. The room wasTINY and had two patient beds. I asked right away if Jess had to leave. Yep. Itold my nurse, “I want to be discharged.” She tried like hell to talk me out ofit. She told me I needed  to latch you on at least 4 times, had to makesure I can pee, and watch the video. I knew I had the right to leave and theywere damned if they were making me stay the night without Jessep or making mestay. I told her I already went pee (I really did) and would watch the video. Wewaited forever for the FAHC pediatrician came to check you out because yourpedi at the time was not associated with FAHC. She said you were good to go!

                In themeantime, Aunt Lisa, Uncle Jason, Jen, and Shane all came to visit you. We gotyou dressed in your little newborn Carter’s fleece outfit that came with abrown and red vest that had a little tractor sewn to it. Of course, stillrocking the camo hat! You still had no latched. You did once for half a secondbut not long enough to call it a latch. I got my IV taken out, got dressed andthe nurse said, “I have never seen someone so energized and ready to roll afterjust giving birth.” We filled out birth certificate paperwork then. She watchedus strap you in. Audios, FAHC, this Momma leaving with baby in tow after beingthere less than 24 hours!

(I feel like I missed something. This was very overwhelming and took me DAYS!)

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Welcome!

Hi there! Thanks for taking the time (and having the interest) to check out our blog. We bought a journal when Hunter was first born and started to write Hunter's birth story but who handwrites anymore? So, here we are. This is our attempt to record and document our journey as first time parents as Hunter grows into the boy we hope he will be!

As I have seen on other blogs that I follow, I will also post articles that come up in the news of our interest, mostly to show Hunter what was going on as he was growing up but also to strike conversation and some, bring up issues that I feel need to be talked about. Another thing that I have become fascinated with is healthy living so from time to time, I will post my attempt on how to lead a healthier and less toxic life. Since Hunter has been born, I have stumbled upon many easy way to live a healthier lifestyle.

 Now that we are parents, we think so critically and like to stay well informed by educating ourselves. Countless nights I have stayed up researching and researching!

To end this first post, I will leave you with a promise for the next post; 1. I would like to write Hunter's birth story 2. Catch the blog up with the last 7.5 months then 3. Tell you a bit more about ourselves.
Again, thanks for stopping by!